Counting Blessings Amidst Afflictions

So the last time I wrote I hadn't been through the temple yet. I went through the temple on Tuesday the 14th in the Arizona Temple. It was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had. I've gone back four times since then in different temples and each experience is unique and amazing. To be honest, I had been struggling with having the Spirit more readily in my life the past year and especially since I made the decision to serve a mission. Satan was really working hard on me. I started to feel like I wasn't good enough to serve a mission and that it was hopeless for me. I was supposed to give a farewell talk in my single's ward in Provo, on temples, that Sunday after I had gone through the temple, and I was really struggling with it for some reason. I couldn't focus on the topic, and I didn't feel like I was being guided by the spirit. I decided to brave the temple on my own for my second time through the Saturday before I was to speak, and I'm so glad I did. I was able to spend some time in the Celestial room praying, reading, and pondering on the topic I was assigned and on the things that I had been struggling with. When I left the temple I felt strengthened in a way that I hadn't felt in a long time. I could feel the spirit with me and I knew that my Heavenly Father was there for me. I am so grateful for the temples and for the gospel! I am glad that I made the decision to serve a mission so that I can help others make it to the temple. Let me set one thing straight though... Satan is still ever present in my life. He is working on me in ways that I never thought he would. It almost seems like he knows he couldn't reach me in the usual ways so he has to see what else he can hit me with. He just loves to make me feel worthless and alone. On the bright side though, everytime Satan attacks me, Heavenly Father sends me angels to lift me back up. It seems like just when I'm giving in to the tears someone always walks in and lets me cry on their shoulder or dries up my tears for me. I'm so grateful for my angels that are there when I need them most. I'm grateful for friends that worry about me even when I try to act strong or like something doesn't really bother me. I'm grateful for friends and angels who go out of their way, even if only for a couple of minutes, to brighten my day and make me feel of worth. Thank you angels... thank you. You mean the world to me, and I only hope that I can be the angel for all of my friends out there in return. Thank you.

Memories...

I write this blog from the good ol' Arizona. Let me tell you... the weather down here is amazing!!! I love Utah and all, but I'm sick and tired of the snow and ice! =) I've been down here for only a day and a half, but it's been amazing so far. It's been so good to see all my old friends and to catch up on things... even if I WAS doing it during classes at church... oops... =) I've done a lot of pondering throughout the day, and it's funny to think how much I've changed since I last lived here, and how much things have changed. I feel so incredibly blessed as I reflect on my past, present, and future. As much as I enjoy being with and seeing my friends down here, I also realize how precious my friends are in Utah (and Texas). I miss them already, and I've only been away for two days! (I can only hope that they are missing me as well!) It's hard for me to come to the stark realization of how little time I have left before I leave on my mission. I know it'll be one of the best experiences of my life, but I don't feel ready to leave the life I have now. I guess that's just part of the pre-mission trials though, right? If only I wasn't so richly blessed and my friends were all jerks to me... then it'd be easier to leave. =) (Now that makes a whole lot of sense, doesn't it?) I'm so grateful for the opportunity that I have to be on one more vacation with my family before I leave. I'm grateful for the time that I have to spend with them without having to worry about other things. I have such limited time left. Time is such a tangible concept for me right now. I've never felt like I've had less time than I do at this very moment. I feel like I should be doing something and being with my loved ones at every possible instant, because if I'm not, then the chance will be lost forever. I know that I'm only going to be gone for a year and a half, but a lot can happen in that allotted time... especially among single adults. I guess more than anything, I'm afraid of the unknown, but aren't we all? Things will never be the same as they are at this very moment; of that I am sure. I will treasure the memories of these times in my heart forever, and in the weeks ahead of me I am determined to create more memories to last me a lifetime to reflect back on in times of trials. Thank you to all the angels in my life that have found their way into my memories already and that will undoubtedly be in the memories of the future. "God gave us our memories that we might have roses in December," and I plan on living my life so that my memories will become part of my happiness. I hope that you all have a fantastic day, and I love and appreciate you all!

Opposition

I know I just posted yesterday, but I forgot one thing. This all on a more serious note. I think I've written before about the challenges of "pre-mission", but it's just become more and more evident to me that Satan does not want me to go on a mission. I never really thought that Satan would try to get at someone physically when he didn't want them to do something... just spiritually, but I've been proven wrong. The most bizarre things just seem to keep on happening.

I was so excited to do my taxes and to get my tax return, and it turned out that I actually owed on my taxes. So, instead of getting money I gave money. Then, my camera randomly broke today, and not to mention I had to replace my windshield due to a crack that I got in it a month or two ago. The most bizarre thing of all though happened this last Sunday. I was going down the stairs on my way to my cousin's baby blessing and my heal caught on the edge of the stair and my foot twisted and I ended up at the bottom of the stairs. I'm so grateful to all of my wonderful friends that were there to help me though. One thing I have noticed is that the tougher things seem to get or the harder Satan is working on me, the more I am blessed as I try to stay close to the Spirit. I've felt such an overwhelming gratitude for my friends that have supported and been there for me through everything since I've made the decision to serve a mission. They've been there for me through everything! Anyway, here's some pictures of my beautiful ankle. Isn't it

pretty? =)

Girls Just Want to Have Fun

So it's been a little while since I've written. A lot has happened too... a lot of good. =) First of all... A couple of weekends ago me and my girl friends here in Provo had a girl's night. It all came about because on of our guy friends decided he wanted a "guy's night" (aka: video game night). Anyway, we didn't have anything planned except that we were going to eat. While there we discovered a wonderful site called "Karaoke Party". It truely is amazing! You should all check it out. We ended up doing karaoke for about 3 and a half hours! Here are some of my favorite pictures of it.

After karaoke, we decided to pull what we call a "caper". Basically it's stealing something from someone and leaving them a ransom note with instructions on what they have to do to get it back. We chose to pull the caper on our good friends, Josh and Clay, simply because that's what they like to do best. The items we chose to caper were Clay's prized "CocoaMotion" from Savers and their prized Risk board that they had colored and lamenated. How were we to get them you ask? Well, Sarah, Darlene, and I knocked on their door which was answered by their roommate Kenny Chuck, who is also a good friend of ours. I asked to use the bathroom and walked right into their bedroom and picked them both up and walked out the back door. It was like stealing candy from a baby. =) After we brought the items back to the girl's night, we all came up with the ransom note in which we demanded a big bag of Skittles and a copy of a song that Josh had previously written about Darlene. We dressed in our capering clothes, put the ransom note on their front door, and took off in our get away car (a little Saturn), in which we crammed 9 girls into. Here's some pictures:

Oh yeah! While doing karaoke, we were invaded by a robot! No joke... It was part of a guy's night apparently. Some guys in our ward were a little jealous of our girl's night, so they had to find a way to be a part of it. =)

That was all for our girl's night, but the fun didn't end there. Last Wednesday we had a ward activity at Classic Skating. It was eighties skating in fact, so I got to sport the eighties look again, and I'm pretty sure I did a much better job at it this time around. Darlene was able to get my bangs sky high and they looked pretty awesome.

I also joined a gang this past month. It's called the BYU 104th Ward Bike Gang. We go out every Sunday (well we will if it ever quits snowing every Sunday) and we ride down to the park to read or take a nap or whatever we want to do. The first one that we had I also got to go for a ride on Elyse's scooter with her. It was amazing! Don't you love how we're matching too?

And last but not least of my random life... My friend's, Kevin and Sarah, and I have this little inside thing about always being on the same wave length. We just seem to always "get" all the same jokes. Well, Sarah and I decided to make t-shirts. Kevin is dating our friend Elyse, so we decided she should probably have a t-shirt too. This is what we came up with... Clever, don't you think? =)